Obligations

Sometimes it feels like things are just been one big clusterfuck after another. After trying to figure out how to pay my rent by myself for a long time I decided to have Thomas and Hannah move in for a while to help out, and watch my house while I'm gone. I'ts funny how many people I've talked to in the past week or so who have told me as overwhelming as things may seem right now, the best possible thing I could do is go on this trip. That makes me even more excited, but also more anxious. Not only am I freaking out about making the trip ain one piece, but now I'm also anticipating some sort of incredible existential experience while in the process. For anyone unaware of what I'm talking about. I quit my job, and come June 1 I am leavig on a tall bike trip around WI, MI, and hopefully ending in Minneapolis on the 30th. Why a tall bike? Because they are fun, and no one to my knowledge has done it before. That plot thickens further though when I stop and realize that I dont even have the bike in 100% working order, let alone have all my gear together. I only have 4 days of work left then I finally get to leave that horrid place for the last time. It's kind of sad but I think a part of me will almost miss it. As much as I hate it, that job has been a part of my life for over a year, and it seems like quiting is just another thing that is disappearing. I guess it's that whole "time to turn the page" thing in my life, and see what happens next. Which is a lot less romantic and alot more intimidating than they make it look on TV. I'm just hoping the next few months of life will go as smoothly as possible, and give me an opportunity to figure out alot of stuff that I've been ignoring for a long time. Who knows, maybe I'll even get my zine rolling again and finally have an issue out by fall. Talk about misplaced priorities. I quit my job to go ride a bike around and scribble in a notebook. Putting things into that perspective helps me understand why when I told a friend my plans the only answer I got was, "well thats stupid, how will you pay your bills?" The answer, I don't know.